Closing Time
I’ve never been great with goodbyes. I’m naturally a melancholy person, and endings reinforce my deepest instincts that all joy and pleasures eventually fade and one is left with loss and disillusionment. Although I am someone who seeks out good times and new experiences, I am aware of the toll they sometimes take—after I launch a new book, for instance, I find myself depressed and despondent the next day. So, what’s next?
One hour away from closing ceremonies, my mind turns to the athletes and their families. How do they deal with the emotional hangover of the end of the Olympic games? Some go on vacation, some take refuge with family, some head back to the gym. Lives have been changed here. Jon Montgomery, for example, realized his dream of skeleton gold and is already using his auctioning skills to raise money for other athletes. He is suddenly a celebrity, as evidenced by his appearance on Oprah. Others are leaving injured, humiliated, or heartbroken. Added to all of this, many are leaving in debt.
Some athletes, like Brian McKeever, a visually-impaired skier who made the Olympic cross-country team and was angling to make history as the first person to ever participate in both the Olympics and the Paralympics when he was told that he would not race, are already thinking ahead to four years from now.
(It is common practice in the 50km race, as it is with the marathon in the summer Olympics, to take an extra qualified athlete even though only a certain number are permitted to race in the actual competition. Let’s hope McKeever’s disappointment doesn’t detract from his Paralympic performance—he is one of the most decorated Paralympians in the world and should medal in Vancouver.)
By contrast, some athletes are retiring after these games and many of these have no clue what the future may hold. Transitioning between competitive athletics and other professions is not always easy. I’ve met several Olympian champions over the course of the last two weeks who are, admittedly, lost without sport. One confessed to me that he likes to write, and has gone through phases where he thinks he might make a new profession of journalism, but then he loses momentum and interest in it. My sport was my passion, he told me. I’m not passionate about teaching. I’m afraid I’ll never be really passionate about anything else ever again. I had no idea what to say, except that I felt lucky writing wasn’t an age-restricted activity, that I can keep writing as long as I like (no guarantee, though, that what I write will be good). That’s why I’ve been trying writing, he replied. But, I don’t know if I have it in me. It’s hard not knowing what to do with yourself.
The end of the Olympics is even hard for me to swallow. I’ve been looking forward to my position at CAN Fund, and meeting the athletes and others in the sports world, for months. The Athlete House has been my place of work, communications, and my social circle for the last 17 days. I have made friends here among the athletes, family members and friends of athletes, donors, and volunteers. We’ve shared an intense, unforgettable time together. Still, I’ll likely never see a lot of these people again.
But until tomorrow, I will leave my melancholy hat in the closet. For the athletes still in Vancouver there is still celebrating to be done—friends to dance with, family to embrace, competitors to congratulate, lovers to…
In fact, closing ceremonies, I’m told, is a massive pick-up runway. As they circle the stadium, a lot of the athletes are actively searching out someone for their last night at the games. (Apparently, women like to pick up medallists, men pick up based on physical looks.) There was even an article in The National Post concerning the arrival of emergency shipments of condoms. Who can blame them for wanting to enjoy the bodies they’ve spent years and years putting into shape?
So, go on and enjoy your night, athletes. You’ve earned it. And good luck with your morning hangover.
(Please note: It’s not quite goodbye for us yet. I will be heading to Grande Prairie, Alberta for the Arctic Games at the end of the week, and will then fly back for the Paralympic Games. Look for more poems and dispatches.)
